1173: Putting Down The Second Arrow: How Self Compassion Heals Anxiety
In today's episode, Gina shares a key element of anxiety recovery: using self-kindness in the face of stress and overwhelm to diffuse self-criticism. Negative self-talk often makes anxiety so much more unbearable than it would be if we acknowledged the anxiety and gave ourself grace and compassion in our thoughts and feelings. Tune in to this episode and learn how to tame anxiety before it get out of control!
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Quote:
If your compassion does not include yourself, it is incomplete.
-Jack Kornfield
Chapters
0:26 Introduction to Self-Compassion
2:07 The Parable of the Two Arrows
6:23 Practicing Self-Compassion
8:33 Five Ways to Cultivate Compassion
15:18 Embracing Your Inner Child
16:04 The Journey of Healing
Summary
In this episode of the Anxiety Coaches Podcast, I delve into a crucial yet often overlooked aspect of our mental health journey: self-compassion. I share insights from my own experiences and teachings that highlight the importance of treating ourselves with kindness, particularly in moments of anxiety and stress. Drawing upon a Buddhist parable, I explain how our reactions to life's inevitable challenges often intensify our suffering through self-criticism and harsh judgments, which I metaphorically refer to as the "second arrow."
The episode begins with an exploration of how anxiety, represented by the metaphorical first arrow, triggers a natural bodily response. However, it is our internal dialogue—the harsh words we say to ourselves—that introduces additional suffering, symbolized by the second arrow. I illustrate this concept by asking listeners to reflect on their beliefs about healing and recovery from anxiety. This narrative serves as a foundation for understanding how self-compassion can buffer against the weight of our challenges.
I introduce five practical strategies to cultivate self-compassion as a means to alleviate anxiety. The first involves recognizing our need for kindness during tough times, coupled with a simple yet effective physical gesture: placing a hand over the heart, allowing us to ground ourselves and activate soothing physiological responses. The second strategy encourages listeners to dig deeper into their feelings, acknowledging underlying emotions that may be contributing to anxiety, such as sadness or frustration.
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